What Would You Do with U.N. Headquarters?
Fri March 14th, 2003 22:52 MSTUN headquarters is symbolic of the United Nations.
The UN is worse than useless. The headquarters building is symbolic of the whole enterprise. Furthermore, it sitting on valuable real estate in the United States, is full of people whose diplomatic immunity allows them to commit crimes, and is a base for espionage.
It Is No Longer Welcome On U.S. Soil!
This blog is sponsoring a contest:
Leave a comment (below) telling us what you would do with UN Headquarters.
Contest ends 2400 3/21/2003.
The only rule is that you may not leave UN Headquarters on U.S. soil.
Go for it…
It’s A Contest!
John Moore wants to know what should be done with the United Nations building, now that its contents have exceeded their use-by date. The only rule is you can’t leave the UN HQ on US soil. My suggestion? Waterproof one
Well, putting them on the top floor of the new WTC is out then, as is bulldozing them into the East River. (or is that not considered soil?)
Without putting them on U.S. soil, the only fitting punishment I can think of is making them the centerpiece of the French variant of the “It’s a small world, afterall” exhibit at Euro-Disney.
I thought I’d start off the suggestions, but Ravenwood beat me to it! To enter a contest entry, just click the Comments button like I did, fill in the boxes, and hit POST (although you might want to hit PREVIEW first).
William Quick, the able blogmeister of Daily Pundit kindly sent us a link, but he posted his great idea on his blog. So, I am posting it here where it belongs
My suggestion? Waterproof one side, tip it over, and use it as a barge to bring the remains of Americans who died defending and liberating France back home, thus giving the UN Building the only honorable task it has ever undertaken in its entire history.
What to do with the U.N.
Useful Fools wants to know. Personally, I’d make them the centerpiece of the French variant of the “It’s a small
Tear the damned thing down, reclaim the land, and turn it into a park. Manhattan needs open space.
Turn it into a museum that highlights the accomplishments of “just wars’, i.e.
The American Revolution
The American Civil War
The First and Second World War
The Cold War
First Gulf War
Maybe the “war never solves anything” nitwits will learn something. I doubt it, as their major motivation appears to be the destruction of the values of Western civilization.
First, win the war on Iraq.
Take the UN building apart, ship it to Baghdad, and see if Hans Blix can figure out where we hid it.
Then rebuild the Twin Towers on the old UN site.
First the UN building must remain in tact. It must be taken apart brick by brick by skilled Navy Seabees. Reassembled on an abandoned oil drilling platform and then towed around the world and anchored off the coast of a member nation for one year before moving on. That way each nation would host the UN about once every 150 years. Since the US has already had 50 years of turns we can expect it to reappear in the year 9503AD. We should have grown enough as a nation in that time to welcome it. (satire alert) I believe Ernest Hemingway said of Paris that it was a “movable feast.” Ditto for the UN.
There is, actually, a small complex of buildings, plus all the legations in the city. The various governments will probably sell their legations, or keep them as guest homes for when their dictators travel to the Big Apple. As for the complex itself… two words: homeless housing. Can’t you see some wino, with his squeegee, sleeping in Kofi’s office?
I think it should be fitted with jet engines and sent to roam around the world like the floating head of Zardoz.
oh give them a home, where the transformers roam…
John Moore wants to know what you would do with U.N. Headquarters. I think that after we kick out every
First we extract our diplomats (and the ones from our friends). Then we take the UN building, intact with diplomats and tow it out to the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. It can be a resting point for ships and an amusement park (the UNpark).
It’s good period architecture. They’d make excellent condos.
Disassemble the UN buildings carefully and use the metal to help rebuild the WTC. Anything rubble left over, deliver to Afghanistan for use as landfill and building materials (might as well get some use out of the UN).
Use the empty space to build a new receiving station ( a la Ellis Island) for the people who WANT to be here.
As for the diplomats, who gives a crap where they go.
First I’d empty it out. Then I’d make it a museum with nothing in it, and I’d charge $1,000 a person to see it. Every tenth person would get knocked on the head with a baseball bat. Thus, all who visited would know why we are no longer part of the U.N.
First and foremost - DON’T empty it. Make sure Kofi Annan, Hans Blix, Dominique De Villepin and their ilk are there. Then get somebody like Controlled Demolition to implode it. Then let New York’s homeless, etc., use it as an outdoor toilet
Any of the above provided the current tenants are evicted.
Though I am partial to the floating head of Zardoz plan…
I’ve got two suggestions. We could either turn the United Nations into an old age home for retired diplomats. When its full when got put it out to sea like an ice floe. The second is we could turn it into the new headquarters for the Chirac Government in Exile.
Move it to that island in the Indian Ocean that is slowly being covered by the the rising ocean levels.
The ideal place for the UN, an international body, is on another international body.
I nominate Antarctica….watch the delegates line up to get assigned there. Watch then get parking tickets in Antarctica. watch them get penguins in trouble.
The possibilities are endless, as is the antarctic night and cold.
Billybob
The building itself should be turned into a museum commemorating the building’s use in such movies as Batman (1966) and North by Northwest.
The organization should rotate between all the member countries in alphabetical order. Let’s see, Albania, Angola, Azerbaijan….
Relocate it to Kinshasa. Once there all those parasites will opt for honest work.
How about we paint the building with a giant bulls-eye and a banner proclaiming “Terrorists: aim here” ?
Oh, I forgot. Terrorists would never attack the UN out of professional courtesy.
Turn it into a theme park. Call it LeftyLand. It’ll be fun for all ages!
The House of Horrors could feature macabre treatments of such notorious left-wingers as Pol Pot and Joseph Stalin.
Move on to AdventureLand where we witness wax reenactments of Bill Clinton commiting perjury before a federal grand jury and Jimmy Carter crashing helicopters into the Iranian desert.
And at night, put the kiddies to bed and head off to the Teddy Kennedy Cocktail Lounge and Swimming Pool. Reservations not required, and dress is casual.
But life jackets are highly recommended.
Ed
Well, we ARE short one shuttle, are we not??
Some floors can be set aside for the holy cause of educating the world’s liberated citizens in dynamic social conflict resolution.
My post.
Place the building in front of the Treasury as a reminder that we owe the UN millions of dollars in dues.
Don’t some of you guys feel like morons now that we’re begging the UN to help us in Iraq…
Nope. The morons are the people who believe that they shouldn’t help us without approval from the UN security council, which has such wonderful veto-holding countries as France and Russia, and is headed by Syria.
You are pathetic, the UN strives to work for peace not for war idiots! The U.S can never replace the world, for every country’s opinion matters! I say move the UN from NY to Canada, because they are more respectful of this legislative body than Bush’s regime would ever be.
unrocks
Do you actually know anything about the United Nations? Do you know that it was recently part of the biggest financial scandal in history, with some of its officers (including Kofi Annan’s son) taking huge bribes from Saddam Hussein, money from the Oil for Food program? Did you know that the UN supervised that program, and as a result none of the money went to help the people of Iraq but instead into the pockets of Saddam (who built 41 palaces during that time) and into the pockets of people he was bribing?
No, you of course don’t know that. You believe that the UN actually does what it claims to do. It is people like you that let this disgusting organization continue to operate, its people stealing money from its operations, and yet it does not do what it is supposed to do: help freedom around the world?
Did you know that every country gets the same vote, which means that China with 1 billion people has the same vote as Lichtenstein? Do you think that’s democratic?
And if you think every country’s opinion matters, would you care to tell me why anyone should care about the opinion of North Korea? You DO know that this country recently starved several million of its own citizens to death, while spending money building nuclear weapons (which it admist)?
What do you think of an organization whose human rights commission is run by the representative of a brutal dictator?
Bush’s government (which is not a regime) doesn’t have a lot of respect for the UN because that organization is corrupt, exists mostly to enrich its employees (with most if its costs payed by the United States), holds conferences on hunger in plush hotels where the delegates have very expensive food, fails to stop massive violations of the peace (like the Rwandan massacre, the Cambodian massacre, the 100,000,000 people massacred by their own Communist countries in the 20th century).
If you want the UN, please invite it to Canada. It is no longer a relevant organization in the world (although a few of its lesser organizations, like WHO, do some good). Its charitable organizations like UNICEF have such high overhead that they would not even qualify as a charity in the United States - the money that goes into UNICEF rarely comes out.
I would strongly suggest that instead of calling some of us “war idiots,” you actually make an effort to find out what is happening in the world.
Just because an organization claims to have good goals doesn’t mean that it really does anything right!
I would suspend it above the us soil with 4 large poles.
I would suspend it above the US soil with 4 large poles.
Be thankful the rest of the world sees past your blustering right-wing idiocy enough to put the UN headquarters in America.
I belive the US government should treeble it’s funds for the UN. Perhaps give over say half the marine corp as a dedicated Blue Beret army and take it up to full strength by taking soldiers from around the world. The expertise of the French, German and Russian army would seem ideal. As would the IDF but they would compremise it’s netrality.
THis armys headquaters could be based at the UN headquaters. And a large statue of a Rwandan with a machette in his head and the logo “while we have fat bellie’s never let them weigh us down and stop us from acting valiantly.
A vast office of UN reform could be built to Beef up the out fit and a human rights commitee given teeth.